Don't you send me to vm
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
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