i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Randomize
