But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
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