i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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