Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.

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(641): View more from Iowa

Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?

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(423): View more from Tennessee

I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!

(615): View more from Tennessee

I don't wanna die...

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(402): View more from Nebraska

her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.

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These 19 Deaths Are Ironically Hilarious
Read it at the TFLN blog
(516): View more from New York

i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.

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(734): View more from Michigan

Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.

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(207): View more from Maine

"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"

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(281): View more from Texas

I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot

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