Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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