Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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