franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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