it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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