You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
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