i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
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