You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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