I seem to have left my pride at pride
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I have post one night stand depression
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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