Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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