no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Randomize
