I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
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