My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
I need to stop coming to work sober
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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