i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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