You can't special order awesome
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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