So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
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Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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