Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize