Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Randomize
