Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(703): View more from Virginia

I'm going to jail i love you

Fav 16 1398 1900
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(908): View more from New Jersey

Are you okay?

(508): View more from Massachusetts

Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.

Fav 19 3500 900
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(509): View more from Washington

i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.

Fav 8 898 3007
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(530): View more from California

Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.

Fav 8 2785 1258
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(501): View more from Arkansas

I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.

Fav 4 1240 762
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(708): View more from Illinois

Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.

Fav 5 659 1645
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(509): View more from Washington

Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game

Fav 3 1289 907
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(908): View more from New Jersey

It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need

Fav 3 763 485
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(719): View more from Colorado

My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.

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