Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
Randomize
