so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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