Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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