he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Randomize
