he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize
