Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
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NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
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its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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