Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
