New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
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