can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize
