bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
