I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
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