her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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