I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Randomize
