on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
You dont lie about slip and slides
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
