Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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