soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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