I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize