Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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