I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
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