One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
did i walk over a car last night?
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
