i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
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