Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
