it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize