Cold hands, warm shart.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
