Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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