I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
He kissed a someone with a penis
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god