We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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