Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
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