He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
No I am not eating basil off your cock
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
