two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
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